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Why Men Lie – 5 Ways He’s Not Being Honest
Sometimes it seems like getting a man to be honest with you in your relationship is nearly impossible. And you might find yourself wondering why men lie to you.
Are all men liars?
Do they lie to hurt women?
Is he always going to deceive you?
Can you ever trust him?
Well, there is no single reason men lie. I wish I could just tell you there was ONE cause, then we could all go and fix it in our relationship. But – there isn’t always a single reason for his romantic deception.
A man lies to you for a variety of reasons.
Let’s start out with:
What Kind Of Lies Do Guys Tell?
The first kind of lie a man tells is –
Lie #1: The ‘Whoopsie’ Lie
An example of a “Whoopsie Lie” is one where you ask him where he went with his guy friends, and he says he went to Garibaldi’s Pub. And then you find out later he really went to Jack’s Brewhouse.
Some might see that oversight as a lie or deception. But to him it was simply a combination of an extra drink with his not really caring about the details.
So be careful of assuming that this Whoopsie Lie is the same as him lying to cover something up. Very often it’s not an important detail.
Lie #2: The Status Lie
Guys are very focused on status.
This is such a prevalent form of lie for both men and women that it’s very likely you’ve “stretched the truth” to be seen in a better light.
Men lie to look more “high-status.” To a man, it’s all about the status and where he feels like he fits on the social pyramid. And yes, he will protect that status by lying.
Lie #3: The Save Face Lie
We all do this one, because we all want to avoid feeling embarrassed. It’s very directly related to Lie #2 about status, only this one is simply to keep a man from looking foolish.
He might lie to avoid letting you know he tripped and fell on his backside in front of a group of friends, so he says he was “tripped.”
Confession: I remember once having had a bit too much to drink and walking into a glass door. I shook it off fast and left as soon as I could to avoid embarrassment and never told anyone until now.
Lie #4: The Manly Lie
When it comes down to it, a guy wants to feel like a guy.
Like… a man.
And in today’s world, it’s getting harder and harder for men to feel this way. From the label of “toxic masculinity” to all kinds of criticism of men, it’s hard for a lot of guys to feel “safe.” (And if anyone is thinking: ‘Good! They get to experience it for once!’ – keep in mind that two Wrongs never makes a Right!)
Many guys will lie to protect their masculinity – and to inflate it.
A popular example of this would be his “number.” As in, the number of women he’s slept with. He’ll always inflate that number slightly to look more like a manly man.
There are plenty of other places a man will lie to retain his feeling of masculinity, such as stories that brag or embellish his accomplishments.
These little deceptions are best left alone. Pointing them out to him – or others – will only push him away.
Lie #5: The “Last Resort” Lie
In a relationship, there will be times when a guy feels as though he is “damned if he does, and damned if he doesn’t.” Meaning that he won’t win no matter what he does.
He feels cornered…
And very often, a woman puts him in this predicament.
For example, maybe you ask him if he’s going to “play that video game all night long?” Which is a sarcastic way of actually saying: “Can you pay some attention to me?”
If a guy hears underhanded requests enough, he’s going to start resenting the indirect, passive-aggressive way in which she asked him.
Women are much more indirect with their communication style. Most women want to avoid direct accusations, and avoid confrontations. This behavior is rewarded from interacting with other women. But it’s not rewarded when communicating with men.
And that’s where a lot of men don’t understand what to do. He feels caught between the proverbial rock and a hard place.
If he just wants to get in a little “me” time, he now feels guilty for doing it…
If he then gives in to make you happy, he will feel a bit resentful…
The “Last Resort” Lie isn’t always a ‘lie.’
You only think he’s lying simply because you never –
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Why Men Lie